Quickie Review: EVIL DEAD (2013)

Note: The review itself will be relatively SPOILER FREE, however, as you near the bottom of this post, you WILL get into spoiler territory.

I was torn on whether or not to say anything about the new EVIL DEAD because everyone and their mother has already shared their thoughts about it online. But seeing as how I can't seem to get the movie out of my head, or avoid any conversation about it, I figured I might as well share my thoughts too.

Though I'm still a bit torn about it, I mostly liked the new EVIL DEAD. It's an enjoyable modern exploitation flick that truly delivers all the gore, violence, and awesome makeup f/x that was promised by its creators. EVIL DEAD follows five young adults who come to a spooky cabin in the woods so that their friend Mia (Jane Levy) can go cold turkey from her heroine addiction.

Naturally this cabin, abandoned for decades, was the scene of a demon cleansing (as you'll discover in the unnecessary opening of the film, which does at the very least set the tone for the rest of the movie), and a certain Book of the Dead was left behind. The hippie-looking nerd of the group named Eric finds the Necronomicon (now lacking a face on its cover and also now completely fireproof) and recites a passage from it (despite a note on the pages saying DON'T READ IT, DON'T THINK IT, DON'T SAY IT!).

This awakens something in the woods, which zooms through the trees and right into Mia, who experiences the franchise's typical tree rape before turning super creepy and violent. The movie then plays out exactly as you expect it would, with demonic forces taking over each person and making them self-mutilate and kill until someone violently stops them. However, the film throws a few twists at us (some of which I'm having a little trouble coming to terms with), and splashes the screen with blood, guts, and bodily dismemberment in numerous scenes that will make you cringe, laugh, and/or cheer!

As far as remakes go, EVIL DEAD is one of the few that gets the formula right. To me, remakes are a necessary evil in an age where every story has already been told over and over again. The important thing is to not only be true to the original, but to somehow improve upon the source material. (This should be Hollywood's rule on remakes: If they can't significantly improve on an older film, then they shouldn't remake it.) And if you can't improve on it, at the very least make it digestible for modern audiences, while giving some love to the fans of the original. But above all, just make a decent movie!

Sam Raimi's classic THE EVIL DEAD is (as of my writing this) 32 years old now, and was ripe for a redo, and I'm pretty content with the one handed to us by producers Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell. They picked a young cast of relative unknowns, gave an unknown director a shot (Fede Alvarez was basically picked because Raimi loved his short film PANIC ATTACK), and packed the movie with more visceral practical f/x than I could have possibly imagined. (I'm amazed at what made it into the theatrical cut; I cannot WAIT to see the uncut version on Blu-ray later this year!)

And it's the f/x that saves this movie, because otherwise it isn't all that interesting. As it stands, the script for EVIL DEAD is the only real problem with the movie. Some of the dialogue (courtesy of  Diablo Cody I assume) is groan inducing at times, and the characters are all one-dimensional and uninteresting. (And don't give me crap for saying this. An example of a gorefest that has well-written characters is Peter Jackson's DEAD-ALIVE! It is far gorier than EVIL DEAD, but is a solid film that actually gives its main characters a story arc. C'mon, it's basic screenwriting people!) Had it not been for the copious amounts of carnage in the second act of the movie, this would probably be a generic PG-13 demonic possession flick.

While it didn't entirely blow me away, EVIL DEAD is one of the better horror remakes to come out in a long time. If it is a box office success (and I know it will be) that means at least two more sequels, and possibly an Army of Darkness 2 and an Evil Dead 7! So get out there and support this movie horror fans! The gore and grue is totally worth the price of admission, and makes this film worthy of:

THREE AND-A-HALF 'RADS'

Now, there's a few things I'd like to discuss, but it will be HEAVY ON SPOILERS. If you do not want anything ruined for you, stop now and go see the film. If you have seen the movie, or just don't give a damn, then read on. But remember... ye have been warned!

FINAL WARNING! TURN BACK NOW!

Ok, I pretty much liked this movie and I loved the effects and gore but there were a few things I didn't particularly care for.

1.) The opening: A group of people assemble in the basement of the "Evil Dead cabin," to cleanse a young girl of her demonic possessor. For some reason this involves hanging dead cats from the ceiling, torture implements, melty-faced onlookers, and a backwoods swamp-witch glancing through the Necronomicon for tips. It's unnecessary, and feels tacked on, as if someone believed that viewers wouldn't understand why the Book of the Dead was in the cabin or how the whole possession thing worked. Why didn't they just use the stick with some sort of tape-recorder or diary to provide the exposition and set things in motion?

2.) The demons: The Deadites have super creepy eyes now and love to mutilate themselves when they aren't using weapons on their victims. I don't mind that the demonically possessed are using nailguns, machetes, crowbars, etc. to attack the living, but do they have to behave like typical cinematic possession victims and talk dirty like Linda Blair? It's like the filmmakers decided "Hey, our Evil Dead movie could sure use some more Exorcist!"

Also, I'm not sure if I like that contact with a possessed person's bodily fluids leads to characters becoming possessed themselves. Mia is tree-raped, Olivia is puked on, Natalie is bitten, and Eric... well I'm not quite sure. (Perhaps the utility knife in his gut may have had some of Mia's tongue-blood on it?) Demonic possession being transmitted zombie-style totally worked in DEMONS (a.k.a. DEMONI, love that flick!) but it just didn't feel right here.

3.) Mia's resurrection + final showdown with Abomi-Mia (a.k.a. Grudge Gollum): Earlier in the film, we learn that Mia overdosed once, died, and was resuscitated with a defibrillator. Later in the film, David (Mia's brother) creates a homemade defib device, then buries his possessed sister alive, because it was the least horrifying method of ridding a person of a demon, according to the Book of the Dead. When he's positive that she's croaked, he jolts her back to life with a car battery... and she's fine?! She had her face partially scalded off with boiling water, she cut her tongue in half, and she received other punishment as well, and all it did was get her off drugs and give her a great complexion?!

Dave dies after rescuing Mia by exploding himself and possessed-hippie Eric, and according to the Necronomicon, five souls are all that is required for the "Abomination" to take physical shape and rise from the Earth. Well let's do a head count: Dave, Eric, Olivia, and Natalie are all dead... so why does Grudge Gollum burst forth from the ground?! Is it because Mia briefly died (seems like a major technicality to me), or is it because Grandpa the Dog was bludgeoned to death offscreen with a hammer earlier in the film? (As we learned from THE GATE, sacrifices don't always have to be human.) And why does the demon look like Mia? Why couldn't it be an awesome monster like the thing that Ash chainsaws in the face during the climax of Evil Dead II?!

 4.) The after-credits stinger: Thanks to Marvel, it seems like every movie that comes out sneaks in an extra scene after the credits are over, usually to set up the next film, or show you what happens to a main (or secondary) character after an ambiguous ending. Not so the case for Evil Dead. I waited eagerly for the credits to finish up because I was told "there was something super cool after the credits are over!" I expected a special cameo, or maybe a setup to the next film. What I got instead was the dramatic silhouette of Bruce Campbell saying "Groovy." Really? I'm all for fan service, and I love The Chin, but that was just...dumb! And I'm not the only one that had the "YEEEEEAHHHHHH.... wait huh?!" reaction to that ten second clip in the theater. Plenty of folks on the web are scratching their collective heads as well.

Once again, I did like the movie and think it's a good start to a hopefully continuing Evil Dead franchise, and I look forward to both the inevitable sequel, and the uncut DVD/Blu-ray. What do you think though? Am I being too hard on EVIL DEAD, or do you agree with my complaints? Did you love it, hate it, or have misgivings of your own? Then comment below or hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.